Only A Few Words
In these blog posts, I often use between 600 and 2,000 words to describe a moment of lived experience with OCD. Sometimes, it’s not easy to fit the circumstances, reactions, and more into such a small space. But this week, I’ve discovered an even bigger challenge - how to describe the OCD experience in only a few lines of dialogue in a musical.
When I started the musical-writing process with a group of friends a little over a month ago, I had no idea how much we would lose in the editing stage. Because we’re planning a virtual show, the director has said that people won’t want to watch for more than an hour, so much of the dialogue has to go.
Even when I was writing the first draft of this character, I struggled to imagine how a character with OCD would live in a fantasy world. After all, there aren’t any pre-existing examples, and the few examples of characters with OCD in the media are often overexaggerated. Unfortunately, when I took my first look at what some of my fellow script-writers had written, I felt like stereotypes ran rampant.
The things that bothered me the most were that the character with OCD had no interest in conversing with her peers and that she could only focus on completely random things to the exclusion of all else.
I can attest to the fact that this is, sometimes, what a first impression looks like. But at the same time, in a musical designed to focus on the way our neurological differences can help rather than hinder us, I definitely had some bones to pick.
I enjoyed that the character is shown as smart and enjoys fussing with things with her hands, but some of the dialogue reminded me a little too much of Sheldon Cooper from “Big Bang Theory.” Although the musical is a comedy, it’s not intended to poke fun at people’s mental health problems.
Somehow, I and the other writers had to fix this problem in the script with only a few lines. Where could we even begin?
The first thing I think helped a lot is that each major character, including this one, is going to have their own song, a moment in the sun to explain who they are and how they’re growing throughout the story. It’s a crucial point to the plot that no character is defeating their mental illness - instead, everyone is learning how to use their mental illness to their advantage in the final fight against evil.
I love the idea of this character using her intelligence and fixation on tinkering to help the greater quest, but I don’t like the idea of her ignoring everything else to only focus on her passions. I think I’d like her better if she was engaging with the other characters, teaching about her interests and learning about others’ interests, and finding a way to turn her ritual of having to tinker with things in a specific way to her advantage.
While it hurts to see that some of my friends hear “OCD” and think “person who can’t make friends because they’re too busy obsessing,” I am grateful to have this opportunity to educate. I signed up for this project to share and learn, and this is a great way to do so both within my circle of friends as well as with anyone who sees the musical once it’s live on Twitch. I don’t quite know what words I will use to describe this character’s life, but no matter how limited it will be, I will clear away as many of the stereotypes as possible and follow through with my dream of creating representation in the fantasy genre.
Ellie, a writer in the Chicago area, was diagnosed with OCD at age 3. She hopes to educate others about her condition and end the stigma against mental illness.